When was the last time you experienced a day that completely did not go according to plan? Mine happened about a week ago, to the extent that I just had to laugh about it because it was almost ridiculous - nothing seemed to go as expected! My day would have been ruined should I have felt frustrated about it (while I had all the reasons to be), but instead it turned out pretty okay eventually, only because I went with the flow - no resistance, not fighting it. I never used to be like this. But then I realized, this too takes practice.
It was day 8 and counting...the message on my car's dashboard still lighted up everytime I started my car, which said: "Cleaning exhaust filter, please continue to drive." When it was first shown, I didn't get it and I just thought I had the permission to keep driving and the car will just do its thang. In the last months, I have not been actively using my car. It was at most a short drive to the school and back, and occassional errands run. For days since then, I reminded myself that I needed to at least check up details in the car manual to understand if there is any maintenance work required of its driver. I read some internet articles but none was really helpful or relevant to what I was looking for. For some reasons, whenever I have to deal with matters that do not interest me yet important, I procrastinate. Can you relate? I took the car manual with me on day 6 and only cared to flip the pages on day 8. And to my amazement, when I finally did that, it took me right to the very page I needed! Right there on the page, I found the section that warned to ideally keep on driving the car until the message on the dashboard disappears to avoid the car having to undergo service maintenance! Gosh, it strike me that my ignorance has been running high for so many days.
Then an ingenious plan came to me (so I thought), I would drive around the city after dropping my kid at school, under the pretext to get to know the place better, while actually the purpose was to allow the car to finish the exhaust cleaning as necessary. After about a 30-minute drive, there was still no sign that the message would clear anytime soon and yet I needed to go to the toilet. I had to drive home and risked the condition of the car, as the filter continued to make sounds. Once I was done, I thought to myself, if I really need to continue driving until the message clears, I might as well make it a trip to another town about half hour's drive away, where I had this grand scheme of plan to stop at the mall, the local Chinese store, clean my car at the car wash center, buy the Christmas tree and grab a milk shake on the way home. I was feeling excited after having been stuck at home for a while.
Off I went again and after about 2 to 3 minutes, I was at the first road junction when I noticed that the message no longer was showing on the dashboard. At that point, I had the choice to either drive home again to continue working, or just go ahead with the plan. I chose the latter and continued with my road trip for the day. Heading to Intratuin to shop for a Christmas tree was the first logical thing to do (also my foremost reason to go there) considering how the targeted locations are spread across the town. This is the best time of the year that I always feel joyous of doing as all the beautiful Christmas decors are out on display and the smell of pine trees everywhere just make the season ever so magical! After about an hour touring the place, I had my Christmas tree in the cart, alongside some unique ornaments and additional pots of plants, and was ready to check out at the cashier. Suddenly, there was a blackout. What was thought to be a mere interruption turned out to be an unforeseen circumstance. All patrons were asked to leave the place immediately since no check-outs can be performed. The staffs would need several hours to sort out the unexpected electricity cut. With much disappointment, I left to hit the nearby mall instead. It must be the cold weather, I felt that I needed the loo again and the mall seemed to be the perfect idea.
After having parked my car, I realized that I was walking into a rather empty mall which I thought was due to the early hours. My brain must be working slow that day....then I realized it was a Monday! Shops do not open until around 1pm on Mondays and it was barely past 11am on my watch. I kept on walking until far off on the other end of the mall, there was this one convenience shop which was open where I could perhaps kill some time while waiting. As I headed first to the public toilet just around the corner, they were all closed down due to COVID19 regulations. Darn, I thought, what is going on today? I proceed to the shop and literally just loafing around. The 'danger' of that was my tendency to buy things that were not necessary at all. And yes, I did end up with some butter cookies, chocolates and some new toys for my kid. I hanged around for another hour or two after all other shops gradually opened their doors again and decided it was time to head home before the day turned dark.
On the way back, I thought that I would give it another try at Intratuin, hoping they would have solved the blackout disaster after that many hours later. I really wanted to get that Christmas tree I found. Unfortunately, there was the same guy at the entrance flagging and signaling people to make U-turns because they apparently have not gotten everything under control. Oh well, I began my journey home. I could not believe it...only when I was almost half way driving that I realized I did not manage to do even half the things that I have set out to do in that town! No Christmas tree, no toilet, and I forgot all about cleaning the car, the Chinese shop and the milk shake! Worse still, I discovered that there was a place just like Intratuin about 5 minutes away from home where I could also get the Christmas tree! I decided to first take a rest at home then maybe head out again to that place later in the afternoon, which I did, not once but twice. On my first trip, I actually forgot to bring along my purse and had to return (I had to hide my cart so that I would not lose the things that I had already spent time picking) and on my second trip, I came back with a broken glass candle holder.....I must have driven hard over the roadbumps somewhere.
On this day, I had ALL the reasons to scream and cry. For some reasons, I felt just the opposite, although definitely knackered. I was surprised at my will to go with flow without feeling the need to complain about how the day went. Instead, I learned to accept that that was just how life is supposed to be and my role is to simply roll with the punches. Through it, I continue to grow. After all, no matter how it went, I did manage to have that Christmas tree all nicely decorated and lighted up by the next day in our living room and had so much fun quality time putting it up with my kid.
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” – Lao-Tzu
It is an art to learn to be at ease with how things ARE. I am not implying that I am good at this but certainly am getting better at it. I begin to really enjoy keeping frustations and annoyance at bay. You should try it too by paying attention to how you react as events unfold deviating from your plan. Having that awareness alone will help you to consciously catch yourself and shift to a better disposition that will serve your well-being over time.
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